Do you think you’re an effective leader? Feedback is one good way to find out, especially through “360 feedback.”
But there’s another, equally powerful way. Take a serious look at your beliefs – your “assumed truths” about yourself, others and how the world works.
Your beliefs dictate your behavior. And unexamined beliefs are like icebergs. Unseen below the surface, they can undermine your good intentions without your awareness.
Instead of believing everything you think, think about what you really believe.
Taking some time to reflect on these questions will help uncover some assumptions that might be interfering with your ability to align your behavior with your intentions to be a better leader.
1. What are you are willing to take a stand for?
When you know what you hold most dearly, what you really value, you can make conscious decisions based on your values.
Leaders of great teams have unswerving commitment to what they believe in. Their consistency inspires confidence and trust in their followers, and sets a standard for them as well.
“Those who stand for nothing will fall for anything.” ~ Alexander Hamilton
2. What do you believe will happen if you let go of control?
When you trust in the potential of others, you naturally stop trying to control all the details, and delegating comes naturally. Leaders of great teams have enthusiasm and positive regard for others. They create opportunities for their people to stretch and assume responsibility.
“What is needed is leaders who are interested in developing leadership in others.” ~ Ella J. Baker
3. What do you really believe about making mistakes?
Strong leaders admit their mistakes and take responsibility for the impact. And then they focus their energies on learning, so they don’t repeat the same mistake.
When something goes wrong, you can wallow in blame or realize it is truly an opportunity to invest in your future and move forward.
“If you have the guts to keep making mistakes, your wisdom and intelligence leap forward with huge momentum.” ~ Holly Near
4. What standards do you set for yourself?
Your character is your greatest source of influence, no matter what your role or position. Your character is the expression of who you are. And influential character is built on a foundation of integrity.
Do you speak up when an ethic has been violated or do you make excuses for minor infractions and look the other way? What do you do with managers who produce great work but are difficult bosses? Do you promote them, transfer them, or confront their behavior?
“Real integrity is doing the right thing, knowing that nobody’s going to know whether you did it or not.” ~ Oprah Winfrey
5. What are your expectations for your team?
The truth is your team can only be as great as you believe it can be, or as great as you believe you can be. Your expectations for your team are a reflection of your expectations for yourself.
Leaders of great teams are not content with the status quo. They set challenging goals for themselves and their team that result in more impressive achievements.
“Always shoot for the bulls-eye. If you miss, at least you’ll hit the target.” ~Don Shula
These are great questions Jesse! We should all ask ourselves these questions on a regular basis. They are especially good questions to ask when coaching leaders too.
I agree it’s worth asking these questions often because sometimes we “know” the right answer, but it’s not what we really believe deep inside, and it can take awhile to get to the place where we see what is really driving our behavior.
I love the last question. Expectations are crucial to leadership. I’ve found that I have a tendency to keep expectations to myself. Unfortunately, this doesn’t help anyone. We have to vocalize our expectations. People need to be clear about expectations, otherwise disappointment follows. Thanks for the great post
Great point about the importance of sharing these thoughts with others. Not only does it help people understand where you stand, but it also helps you get feedback and a chance to explore them more deeply.
Such great and critical questions to ask ourselves, Jesse. My favorite is #2. I’ve found in my work with emerging leaders that so many are, deep down, terribly afraid of letting go because of their fear and anxiety that something bad will happen, or that they’ll be blamed and criticized for errors or problems that arise. Actually, the opposite is true. The more you can empower others to build and leverage their strengths and talents, the more success is possible for all. Thanks for a great list that all leaders, managers and professionals should ask themselves today.
So true! “The more you can empower others to build and leverage their strengths and talents, the more success is possible for all.” Thanks for the great description of the underlying fears around this issue.
Do positive afirmations, such as “I like myself, I can do it” and so, really work, as some gurus advocate, or they are useless if not supported for strong and genuine beliefs.
I think this is a great question, Sergio. I do know that it is possible to rewire your neural pathways and that affirmations can help. But I don’t think you can easily get around icebergs without taking them seriously, as the Titanic found out.
Hi Jessie
Great set of questions though it is too bad so few executive ever bother to even ask themselves one of them. In general I know they avoid these because they really don’t want the answer, even from themselves. Age old adage the truth hurts.
Another adage that comes to mind is: “What you resist, persists.” Sooner or later, most people have an opportunity to answer a wake up call. You might appreciate this true story about what happened to an executive I worked with briefly who ignored her wake up call. How to Answer a Wake Up Call.
My dad was a minister and I heard him tell teens in our youth group more times than I can count “If you don’t stand for something, you’ll fall for anything.” He never claimed credit of the quote but he made his point every time.
I’ve been told I’m too hard on myself. It isn’t true, of course. I could be a lot harder on myself. I heard a little different version of the quote by Oprah that I have lived by since the early 80s. “Your character is what you do when nobody is watching.” Different words, same meaning.
You posts consistently speak to me. I appreciate the thought and work you put into them.
Thank you for sharing your own experience and your truth, Jane.
“What are you willing to stand for?” – I like all the questions, but I think the first one moves my stomach the most. I believe it is the question that is a big part of “my life’s lesson” or why I am here as some would say. I am very clear about my values and boundaries, but the decisions I have made based on feeling the line has been crossed have been the tricky bits. One can’t be self-righteous in approach, yet one also can’t simply sell one’s soul either.
That balance is a key one to get right for me. It’s almost as if I see it as a possible “self destruct” button if the decision from the question is not dealt with appropriately.
Great post
It’s my favorite question, too, Thabo, and you do a really nice job explaining the nuances of why it is important.
Great questions, Jesse!
You know, personally I am better off taking feedback and comparing it with the results I need to achieve before changing myself. Self-reflection is tough because more often than not, I do not know how people perceive me. Changing is even tougher because of Newton’s law – “Everything continues in its state of rest or of uniform motion unless acted upon by an external force”. In this case, the external force refers to feedback from others based on their perception(s) of me.
On point #2, I try to adopt the following principle – “Lose control to gain control”. more often than not, our teams are perfectly capable of handling themselves. All I have to do is stop peering over their shoulder, let them do what they are good at and be accountable when the need arises.
Very nice blog post! Sure made me think!!
Hi Sudhir, Love your principle “Lose control to gain control.” A beautiful paradox!
One way of understand these questions is not for self-evaluation, but as a way of helping to set your goals – the real goals that you might want to get feedback on. So glad this post made you think!
Jesse,
I hope this email meets you well. There is nothing to contest in regard to those 5 questions. In addition, some people lack the confidence in themselves. These questions confront us daily at our duty post. Since some lack that confidence and they are not sincere, they are unable to answer those questions. We like blame shifting. Instead of us to accept our mistakes, we try to blame others, the system, management or our immediate boss. Character also counts. Our character shows the kind of value we have and believe in.
I like your post.
Bayo Oladosu
Thanks for your thought-provoking comments Bayo. You touch on many important points.
These are all compelling questions every leader should consider before taking action. I think one of the best questions related to letting go of control and allowing others to assume leadership roles. This is one of the toughest ones to do but crucial to ensure ongoing growth and success.
Thanks for your thoughts, Altus. One of the most important roles for leaders is to create more leaders. That’s not possible unless they are willing to let go of the reins.